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Assault Sporks for sale on eBay! Get 'em before Feinstein bans them!


Regular Member
Mar 11, 2012
Middletown, CT

"Q: Is there any special training required to properly handle the Assault Spork. I do not want to unknowingly do something irresponsible and be held accountable for actions I do not know are illegal. I live in New York City and will attempt to grandfather this item along with my contraband 24oz Pepsi cup should this become illegal in the future. Jan-12-13
A: Training is unnecessary. Should anyone be harmed by your assault spork, the assault spork will be blamed, not you. So you are good to go. You have anymore of the 24oz pepsi cups? I have a few beta 100oz pepsi cups on backorder myself."


Regular Member
Jun 14, 2012
Fairfax VA
I actually liked this question and answer:

Q: Is this Assault Spork Massachusetts compliant? All Mass legal forks are required to be fully compatable with food stamps and EBT cards.

A: My assault rocks are not compatible with food stamps or EBT. There is a built in feature that will make you choke and suddenly get off the government dime.


Founder's Club Member
Nov 15, 2006
Fairfax Co., VA
ROFL...But we can't discuss Open Carry of Long Guns. Good job owners/Mods...

Tongue in cheek...I know and follow the rules. Just being funny..

Moreover, an articulate request for a narrowly tailored specific exception based on extraordinary circumstances will be ignored. The only response being to reiterate the very rule for which an exception was requested, as though that reiteration actually addressed the request. Oh, and then the thread gets locked.